Pure

I just returned from 3 days in Mexico, celebrating as our good friends got married on the Playa Mujeres. We lived in the lap of luxury at an all-inclusive resort and we drank the days away at pool bars and on pirate ship cruises, but somewhere in all that I still found time for some reflection against the backdrop of the ocean water.

I had a couple hours to myself Friday afternoon so I headed down to the beach to play in the ocean for a while. In between bobbing in the waves and drying off in the sun, I took a walk along the shore, admiring what a purifying force the ocean is. The great vastness, the unceasing ebb and flow of the tides, the omnipresent roar and the blanket of sun that drown out the earthly “monkey brain” – not even the serene forests or the beautiful mountains or the quiet canyons have the ocean’s unique and mighty meditative power. Just yesterday, I’d been listening to some new friends at the wedding talk about all the half and full marathons they run, and I had a sudden fierce longing for the days when I was in long distance racing shape. I missed that feeling of being in great shape; where I am now feels so far from the breakthrough races I had in the spring of 2015 and the gritty marathon PR I ran this past May. Now, as the salty waves lapped at my ankles, I thought about that moment from yesterday and the great quieting effect of the ocean. By washing away my busy thoughts, the ocean’s great purity was getting me back in touch with my needs – the things that bring purity into my life.

The goals I made for this year aren’t just about achieving success, or even about the more commonly cited motivation of enjoying the process of working toward something. There is no “something”. There is only a calling back to the things that make me feel pure, and immersing myself in these specific goals/resolutions is a way of answering that calling.

Eating well, which I’ve never been awesome at, is the easiest example here. It is purifying in the most literal form: I strive to put better things in my body so it feels better and maintains more energy and vitality.

There is a lyric in a famous Blind Melon song that goes: “all I can do is read a book to stay awake/and it rips my life away, but it’s a great escape“. That “ripping” is how reading invigorates me, how it purifies my mind. Immersing myself in literature, different stories and viewpoints and lives, is like a big hydrating glass of cold water for my brain.

The practice of minimalism makes my soul feel pure in a way that’s harder to put my finger on, that is mysterious and promising. Having less – physical clutter, mental clutter, schedule clutter – makes me feel more connected the world around me and the life I lead. Acquiring clutter and stuff is like building a skyscraper – as I add more floors and get higher from the city below, I feel less centered, further away from my roots. The practice of minimalism is my short, stocky building: keeping me grounded and in touch with the world around me.

And, of course, running. Like eating well, it is purifying in the physical sense – Exercise! Endorphins! Fitness-building! – but there is very much a spiritual component to it as well. Running is very meditative. The steady rhythm of heartbeat and striding feet, the air in your lungs, moving through the world on foot (even if, in my case, it is usually just on unattractive city streets). It’s being present in time but removed from the social media updates, the news alerts, the gravity of life. It’s letting your mind be active without being consumed. I want running back in my life not just to get fitter but because my life needs more of these special meditative sessions that only running has been able to give me.

Now, I’m trying to reflect on the goals I’ve set in a new way – to remind myself of this calling they answer, not just the rewards they provide. I’m trying to remember the waves and the dull roar of water pushing out the noise – the purification.

 

Advertisements

6 thoughts on “Pure

  1. Ah, the beach is so wonderful for cleansing the soul! Looks and sounds like the perfect trip!! Thanks for stopping by my blog! I hadn’t realized that I didn’t click the follow button on your new blog but I’ve rectified that quickly! ❤

    Like

  2. I love that your goals this year are to do the simple things that make you happy. I am trying not to overcomplicate things this year too. I want to listen to my body more and do what feels right that day.

    I have found whenever I am stress free and relaxed (like on vacation) I feel myself yearning for a great run, thinking about having a hard training cycle and dreaming about 2014-2015 when everything was going right. Then eventually reality hits me upside the head! I get back into the grind of work-work-work and feel tired and then that feeling of wanting a great training cycle is chipped away by exhaustion and stress.

    I am trying very hard this year to protect that little bit of passion and fire I am feeling for training. I’m trying to do that by allowing myself to rest on the days that I really feel exhausted, instead of forcing myself out for what is probably an unnecessary short/easy run. Hopefully by being more in tune with my physical and mental state I can kindle the “train hard” fire instead of squashing it out by letting the grind take over.

    Like

  3. Sounds like this trip was just what you needed to think about the essence of your goals and your direction for this year. Being able to wash away busy thoughts and focus on what’s important is always wonderful. Glad you were able to experience that! I love how you’re using your goals to help you get to a state important for you, not just about checking off boxes and adding up accomplishments.

    Like

  4. The trip sounds great! I am glad you soaked up all the sun and enjoyed it 🙂
    Your statement about letting your mind be active but not consumed is the perfect way to describe what draws us into exercise, pushing our limits, and how healthy it is for us to have a release. That is why I love hiking so much, my senses take in the best of the world when I get away and go hike a mountain.
    I have started off slow this year too and I try to take it one day at a time.
    The crazy thing about fitness is it is like climbing a mountain, you get to the top you soak it all in, but we have to go down sometime. I tell myself all the time I can turn around and go back up anytime, but sometimes we forget how steep it is. I am determined to keep going up and down though till I can’t 🙂
    I actually have a few healthy lunches ready for the next two days! It is the small things lol Pack a good lunch and check off eating well 🙂 Have a good week!

    Like

  5. Sounds like you had a great trip. So glad you got some time to reflect and dig a bit deeper into your goals for the year. Its strange how signs come from all walks of life. Who would of thought a small dinner conversation would spur some deep thought and a more defined horizon for the year. I always find that amazing.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s